I surrender

That's it. I give up.

I can't do this anymore, no, more than that. I SHOULDN'T do this anymore.

It's too much effort these games we play. No. I just can't.

The sad thing is you warned me. I can't get angry because you were always truthful. I just had this hope you see, this dream that has destroyed me.

I am your handkerchief. And you just keep using e and then forgetting me then washing me clean and using me again when you have your next cold.

Well no more. I'm just going to have to not.

I don't even know how to stop myself.

But I think I've got to, because this past week you've starved me, so I need to accept that this is all it is and all it'll ever be.

I know where I am now. For that is what I now realise this is, I can't even escape unscathed. I'd say I'd try not to let you hurt me, but I don't know. Perhaps not.

I feel like Gatsby. My dream is destroyed so now I'm waiting for a call that deep down I know is never going to come. I had my dream (briefly) but now the sun has set on that one and I have to deal with the all consuming night.

So I'll just wait here until a crazy man revenge shoots me, for maybe that would be easier.